This morning we woke up to a thick, spooky fog, thereby kicking off the proper mood to our day. We have a big day planned full of costume parades, trick or treating at Daddy’s work, trick or treating in our neighborhood, handing out candy to trick or treaters, and watching spoooooky moooovies! I hope everyone has a happy and safe holiday, and don’t worry, there will definitely be pictures up tomorrow!
To hopefully enhance the benefits of my new life as an Athletic Super Momma, I started taking flax seed oil capsules. It was highly recommended by my beloved hubby, and since he has done a ton of research about all things exercise oriented, I tend to trust his recommendations. (And believe it or not, he doesn’t restrict all of his research to the internet like I do. Sometimes he talks to actual people! I KNOW!) The problem is this: the pills are HUGE! GINORMOUS, as my 4 year old would say! They could possibly choke a horse. No lie. Needless to say, it sets my gag reflex off just looking at the darn things.
Tonight, after my workout, was the first time I took one of these pills. I got my great big glass of water and readied myself, water in one hand, pill in the other. I bent my knees slightly (so as to provide any necessary leverage, you see) and bounced the pill around in my hand a little bit. "You can do this," I told myself. "It only looks big. You. Can. Do. This." I glanced up at the members of my family who were seated around the table eating dinner.
My husband smiled at me and said encouragingly, "I hope it doesn’t go down sideways!" Then he burst out laughing. It was at this point that the children decided to join in the cheering. Shouts of "Don’t choke, Mommy!" and, "How are you gonna swallow that?" filled the room. My personal favorite came when Ethan started chanting, "Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!" as though I had been magically transported to a college frat house kegger, minus the keg.
I, of course, started laughing at the ridiculousness of the situtation. This caused me difficulty in my pill taking, however. As many of you know, it has been scientifically proven that it is difficult to swallow anything when you can’t wipe the smile off your face. You can ask any scientist. Go on. They’ll tell you. I tried in vain to get over my giggles. That’s when I decided to duck into the little bathroom just off of our kitchen so that I could have some privacy. But as any mom can tell you, privacy is merely a fantasy that moms fill their day dreams with while scrubbing poop smears off of the walls, tying their childrens’ shoes, and nursing the baby. All at the same time. Moms are nothing if not versatile.
I got myself in the bathroom and closed the door behind me. I went to turn the lock when I realized I had a problem. With my water in one hand and the horse pill in the other, I couldn’t lock the door. Meanwhile, my loving husband had positioned himself just outside of the bathroom door so that I could still hear him chuckling. He’s thoughtful like that. And Ethan had begun shouting his chant so that I would still be able to hear it. "GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!" He inherited his thoughtfulness from his father, it seems. I decided to use my bare foot to wedge the door shut and get this pill taking over with. Suddenly, from the crack under the door, I heard a little voice saying, "Mommy? Are you okay in there?" That’s when the little fingers started reaching under the door and poking me between the toes.
I jumped back, tossed the pill in my mouth, and downed most of my glass of water, hoping beyond hope that it wouldn’t turn sideways on the way down. Then door burst open to reveal my family, cheering me on! I stepped out of the bathroom and raised my arms in triumph like a prize-fighter declaring their supremacy! Huzzah! Everyone shouted their hurrays and then we returned to our regularly scheduled programming, already in progress. And all I could think was that if every mom had this kind of support from their families, the world would be a much more frustrating happier place!
Today is the day, people! Today I go back to the gym! Quite frankly, I’m a little nervous. It’s been a long time since I spent any time actually exercising in a gym. At least three years. And I was almost 20 pounds lighter then. Which of course is a sure sign that I do indeed need to go to the gym, but I really don’t want to be sweatin’ in front of all those strangers in my too small workout clothes. And, no, I will not go buy new workout clothes because I refuse to acknowledge the existence of the additional 20 pounds. If I don’t buy new clothes, the pounds simply do not exist. Right? The saddest part of all of this is that I have already dropped below my prepregnancy weight, so I can’t even use that as my excuse! Regardless of my apprehension, I will be hittin’ the mats this evening as soon as Andrew gets home from work which is in abooouuut…30 minutes! Help! Somebody stop me before I do something crazy, like 45 minutes on the stairmaster!
I saw the first video a few years ago and loved it. The other day we found the second one, which is part two of the first. See if you can guess where these guys work at now.
Along with all of our other junk mail, we got a catalog for My Twinn in the mail the other day. Aurora loves it! She carries it around and sits down to read it, flipping pages back and forth and pointing out all her favorite dolls. This is very cute. In fact, it’s down right adorable! However, the catalog is totally creepy! You send in a picture of your child to the company along with an order form detailing any moles and freckles and what not your child may have, and you get a doll that looks just like your child in less than four weeks! You can even order matching outfits so that your child and her new doll can look exactly alike! The idea sounds fine, but a quick perusal of the catalog confirms that it is indeed shiver inducing. All the dolls look like something out of one of those horror flicks where the dolls come to life and murder people at night! Anyone have any ideas how I can get rid of the catalog without my daughter noticing that her new favorite "book" is missing?
I saw this over on Lainey’s blog. You go to Google and do a search for "(your name) needs". Here’s what a search for "Melissa needs" popped up:
Melissa needs:
)And that was just the first three pages! There was a ton more stuff I could’ve put on here! You should try it out and then let me know so I can see just what it is that you need. Because I’m looking for Christmas gift ideas a good laugh!
My husband and his friend have started lifting weights and have been doing all sorts of research on the internet about proper diet and workout methods for the best results. They check in on body building forums occassionlally to keep up on the latest tips and tricks. Today, Andrew was reading the forums when he came across this gem. The atrocious grammar alone was enough to make me chuckle, but the responses had me laughing hard! It’s a fun little glimpse into a world that is not my own! Enjoy!
We were looking on Youtube to find alphabet videos to help Ethan practice for school when we found this:
Pretty funny, am I right? Then we saw this:
HAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAA! HEEHEEHEEHEEHEE! HOOOO! HEEEE! *COUGH* *WHEEZE* Okay, okay, I’m okay. I got it under control now. It was just…just…it was…HAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAA! HEEHEEHEEHEEHEE! AHHHHH!
Occasionally, Andrew says something at church that gives me a fit of the giggles. Today’s Sunday School lesson focused on the Hebrews section in the bible. Our teacher was doing a compare and contrast thing with Mosaic Law and the Higher Law. Andrew got me during the part about animal sacrifice.
Teacher: "You didn’t see anyone bring sheep to church this morning, now did you?"
Andrew: *leans over to me and whispers* "Oh. Don’t I feel silly!"
I spent the rest of class practicing my deep breathing skills to keep from laughing out loud! No body gave me dirty looks or asked us to leave, this time anyway. But that’s a story for another blog post. Good times, people! Good times!
Meteorology can be scary! The Weather Channel put out a weather warning that had this to say about what to expect from tonight’s weather.
"… Thunderstorms will continue through the remainder of the afternoon and evening, and the risk of a funnel cloud will continue. There will likely be heavy showers at times that could cause ponding of water from slow or blocked drains due to leaves that have been falling from trees."
And then comes my favorite part!
"Small hail is also likely…as well as gusty winds near to 30 mph…and deadly lightning!"
Dun-dun-dunnnnnnnn! Okay, so I added the italics and the exclamation point at the end myself, but the rest is pure Weather Channel classic! It’s so very spoooooky!
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